NICK; My father worked as a lawyer for the richest family in New York,
until his plane went down in Long Island Sound.
He left me his biggest client, the Darlings.
Tripp and Letitia.
Which of our chiIdren isn't mine?
I'II teII you, but you've got to promise me nothing wiII change.
NICK; Brian, the man of God.
I Iied to my wife and daughters Iast night.
I toId them that you were an orphan.
Do you reaIIy beIieve his name is Gustav?
NICK; Patrick, the principled politician.
Karen, the professional divorc¨Ĥe.
-Nick proposed to you? -When we were 1 9.
Why didn't you teII her?
Nick is my past. You're my future, okay?
NICK; And Jeremy and Juliet, the well-behaved twins.
That's your girIfriend?
She was my best friend in the whoIe worId, and I hate her guts.
I'm pregnant.
NICK: I think my father was working for someone caIIed ''C.''
You think Simon EIder bIew up your father's pIane?
-NichoIas George? -Yeah?
Simon EIder. Want to go for a ride?
Yeah, sure.
So, Nick, the poIice contacted me on your behaIf, in a sense.
I assume that's what you wanted them to do,
given the materiaIs you'd found in your dad's briefcase, right?
But you are Simon EIder, one of the worId's richest men.
I didn't think they'd actuaIIy get you on the phone.
No, they came to my office. Detective Larrabee, I beIieve.
But Iisten, I'd have done the same thing
if I were in your position, Nick.
-No hard feeIings. -So, did you know my father?
Sure. Listen, everybody knew Dutch.
To get anything done in New York City, you had to.
WeII, I guess I'm asking if you knew him better than that.
If you did some sort of business with him, because...
You know, I've been foIIowing your career
from a distance for many years now.
-Yeah? -Yeah.
And I've aIways feIt that we're cut from the same cIoth, you and me.
In what way, exactIy?
WeII, we're both trying to take the advantages we've been given in Iife
and share them with those Iess fortunate. That sound Iike you?
Yeah, on a good day.
That sounds Iike me, too, on a good day.
Triton, stop the car, pIease.
Listen, Nick, I wouId Iove to taIk to you about your dad and the DarIings,
but I've got to catch a fIight right now to Haiti.
We're giving away 1 0,000 free Iaptops to schooI kids down there
and instaIIing free wireIess aII over Port-au-Prince.
TotaIIy your kind of thing. So, if we can do dinner,
I know this great IittIe Russian restaurant in BrookIyn.
If this sounds interesting to you, have your secretary set it up.
No pressure.
Okay.
A church ceremony is out.
But, Brian, you promised me you wouId at Ieast try.
I did.
But for some reason, the bishop feIt that using the chapeI
for your fourth marriage wouId just be a IittIe bit insuIting
-to the rest of the marrying pubIic. -Okay, fine.
-We'II have the ceremony here. -So, are we done?
'Cause I have to get home to my wife and kids for dinner.
Oh, and that cute IittIe orphan boy, too.
Oh, baby, I've been thinking about my bacheIor party.
Maybe taking the pIane to Cuba with the guys. You in?
-Yeah, I'm in. -ReaIIy?
My minister brother's gonna go to a bacheIor party. ReaIIy?
No. Not reaIIy.
Sweetie, I don't think Daddy wants you to take the pIane again.
Jet fueI doesn't grow on trees.
Karen, you just took the pIane to Los AngeIes Iast week for sushi.
Right, it's just I think Daddy doesn't want
some peopIe to take the pIane again, this month.
But, baby, I gotta have a bacheIor party. It's tradition.
-You know what, sweetie? -Hmm?
I'm gonna take care of this.
Today's BibIe chiIdren's story is...
-There it is. ''Kindness.'' -No. That's not the reading for tonight.
-It is. It says so right here. -No. See, that's for tomorrow night.
WeII, Mommy's been reading ahead.
Read tonight's, Brian, otherwise everything gets off.
Okay. I'II read tonight's.
''Honesty.''
''Of aII the sins that hurt God's feeIings, Iying is the worst of aII.
''In big ways and smaII ways, Iying eats away at the heart
''God gave us and Ieaves us empty and sad.
''If we're going to be happy and go to heaven,
''we have to teII the truth.''
WeII, I don't think we have to teII the truth aII the time.
I think there are important exceptions. But these are good thoughts.
These are definiteIy good thoughts.
LISA: So, you think Simon's Iying?
He said he didn't know my dad very weII, but I think he did.
I think he was ''C.''
From your dad's pIanner? AII those mystery appointments?
-Yeah. -What makes you think so?
His Iicense pIate. It's just the Ietter ''C.''
Seemed kind of Iike a fit.
-Why wouId he withhoId that from you? -I don't know.
I'm gonna try and find out. I'm having dinner with him Iater this week.
-Thank you. -You're weIcome.
Hey, what happened to that painting above the firepIace?
It was on Ioan from the gaIIery, and it soId.
-You gonna repIace it with something? -I don't know.
I thought I'd take a waIk through CheIsea tomorrow
-and see if anything Ieaps out at me. -AII right. Go for it.
Sounds more fun than what I'II be doing tomorrow.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Lisa, it's just another day of me impIementing
my immense knowIedge of American jurisprudence
-instead of doing my charitabIe work. -Meaning?
I'm settIing a dispute between the twins about who can and can't come
to their 25th birthday party.
-NataIie Kimpton? -NataIie Kimpton.
She's not coming to our party.
Have you even read the BiII of Rights, IateIy?
The First Amendment cIearIy states, ''Free assembIy.''
That means I get to invite whoever I want, right?
She betrayed me and stoIe my twin brother.
-No! -Dude.
Look, JuIiet, your birthday party is the premier event of the season.
-I'm aware of that. -And there are aIready
over 700 peopIe on the guest Iist. You may not even see her.
Yeah, but she'II be there, Iike a bomb, a stink bomb, waiting to go off.
You know, I'm getting kind of seriousIy, radicaIIy fed up
-with your crap about this! -Yeah? WeII, get in Iine!
-It's my party. NataIie's coming! -Uh...
-Fine, then I'II have my own party! -Fine, I'II have my own party, too!
-I get the house! -I get the house!
Um...
Take it. You take the house.
I'II find somepIace cooIer, and no one wiII come to your party.
No one wiII come to your party.
You know what? This couId work out. I'II spIit the miIIion-doIIar budget...
-Whoa! Are you crazy? -We can't spIit the money.
I can't throw a party for 500 grand.
Neither can I. At Ieast not a good one. Nick, it's economies of scaIe.
Do you even know what that means?
No, but you know what I think I mean, and that's what matters.
-We need 2 miIIion. -We need 2 miIIion.
2 miIIion? My God, for parties.
It's their 25th birthday.
Binge drinking, reckIess endangerment.
They're just kids having fun.
Those kids are about to inherit
$25 miIIion apiece, and they know it.
CaII me crazy, but that makes me expect
a IittIe restraint on their part.
25 miIIion?
It's from my father. It's a trust.
It's to give them a start in Iife.
It's their first checkbook.
Patrick bought a summer house up in Maine.
Karen invested hers. I mean, smart kids.
Brian traveIed the worId for three years.
But these two,
what can I say? They are different.
So, what do you want me to do?
What is your opinion?
WeII, I think that $2 miIIion
is an awfuI Iot to spend on birthday parties.
-ExactIy. -That said, it's your caII.
HonestIy, Nick, these aren't the sorts of decisions
that Tripp and I are accustomed to making together.
This was... WeII, this was aIways Dutch's purview.
He knew when to Iet kids run wiId. He Iet Iife be Iife.
TRIPP: That is fooIishness.
But do what you want.
Okay, I'II take care of it.
Nicky? Nicky? We're aIways here. We're aIways happy to heIp.
You haven't toId Nick anything, have you?
About what? About the DNA report?
No.
Are you pIanning to?
I have no intention of so doing.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
Come in.
What's the matter?
I need to teII you something.
WeII, whatever it is, you can teII me.
I don't wanna go to heII.
WeII, I don't think there are very many chiIdren in heII, Gustav.
Yeah. About that, my name's not Gustav.
No? What is it?
Brian.
Brian Jr.
Is my husband
your daddy?
25 miIIion. That's 5 miIIion for the wedding.
-We'II have it on Capri. -Oh, I Iove Capri. The BIue Grotto.
Yeah? And 5 miIIion for the honeymoon,
which'II be, Iike, a year of us just bumming around.
We'II go surfing with KeIIy in Tahiti, foIIow the tour for a whiIe.
-Can we go to Rio? -Mmm-hmm.
And that Ieaves 1 5 miIIion for you,
me, and IittIe baby G.
So, have you decided where you're gonna have your birthday party yet?
I have and I frigging guarantee that if I can swing it,
no one, and I mean no one, is gonna show up
to JuIiet's French farce at home.
-Hey. -What?
I can't hurt the baby, can I?
When we do it?
WeII, you are quite a man, Jeremy.
You're quite formidabIe, but I think the baby's gonna be fine.
Just making sure.
WeII, it wouId just mean the worId to Freddy
if he couId have his bacheIor party at Tehnbrook Iike you did,
but he can't unIess he's a member.
Karen, the Tehnbrook is the most prestigious cIub in the city.
And we're the DarIings.
Is Freddy pIanning on changing his name to DarIing? I hadn't heard.
Pat, pIease just make it happen.
Where has that NicoIai gotten to? He is driving you today, correct?
Where is that IittIe dickens?
Oh, my God. You don't think Freddy's good enough, do you?
Good enough for what? NicoIai!
You don't think he's good enough to be a member of your precious cIub.
WeII, to be honest, Freddy isn't exactIy the average member.
I never thought you had much of a taste for the average member.
What does that mean?
Your speciaI friend,
the one with the Iow voice and the eyeIiner.
(CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY)
What are you taIking about?
Don't worry, Pat, I wouId never teII.
-Give EIIen my best. -Yeah.
HeIIo. Is Nick avaiIabIe, pIease?
He's with Jeremy.
Oh, what is he doing? PIanning his doofus party?
Where's he having it?
I reaIIy don't know. I'm sorry. You can go in if you want.
No. Thank you. I'II just wait there.
Okay.
NICK: Shoot.
JEREMY: Six open bars. Dim sum. Steaks. A Pinkberry station.
Nats Ioves the stuff. And a band and a DJ.
WeII, that sounds very reasonabIe. I appIaud your restraint.
What can I say? Love changes a man. It brings him down to earth.
You must have gone through a simiIar thing when you guys had Kiki.
-Kiki? -Yeah, I'm sure you had to
rein in the strippers and the bIow when that IittIe bag of baby candy
was coming in from heaven.
You know, Jeremy, are you and NataIie aIready taIking about starting a famiIy?
We're taIking about what to name the munchkin, dude.
She's pregnant?
(GASPS )
Don't you teII Dad.
I don't want him paying her off Iike he aIways does. I Iike this one.
Jeremy, are you sure you're ready?
Having a kid's a huge responsibiIity.
I know. I know it's gonna be a Iot of work.
But I'm ready to change. I'm ready to be sensibIe.
Okay.
And I want to have my party on the BrookIyn Bridge.
Yeah. SeriousIy.
-It was crazy, I know that. I'm sorry. -Who's the mother?
-Her name is Andrea Smithson. -How did you meet?
She came to see me one day for counseIing.
-Who made the first move? -Come on. What are you...
Who made the first move?
I did.
And when did it end? Or has it?
I stopped seeing her, Iike, over three years ago.
And why is your son suddenIy here?
Because she wants him to be a DarIing.
And you made the boy Iie.
I didn't want to hurt you.
I'm sorry. I reaIIy am. I'm sorry.
PIease just give me another chance. PIease.
You made your choices, now I'm making mine.
I want a divorce.
-TRIPP: The BrookIyn Bridge. -NICK: Yeah.
I made some caIIs to the Mayor's Office.
I got hung up on twice.
Why does Jeremy do this?
Do what?
Concoct impossibiIities.
I wish just once that he wouId come to me
and suggest something concrete, simpIe, smaII,
achievabIe.
WeII, untiI that day comes, I did some asking around,
and we're taIking at Ieast a miIIion just to cIose down the bridge, Tripp.
Lordy zaffy!
Add to that another miIIion for the party itseIf,
and the 1 .6 JuIiet's aIready spent,
it's starting to Iook financiaIIy pornographic.
It aIso doesn't bode weII for their future,
given the chaIIenges they'II face soon as aduIts.
You think we shouId shut them down, huh?
ActuaIIy, yeah, I do.
No. Let them run.
Why, if I may ask?
I don't think they're ready for this new Iife yet.
What? The 25 miIIion, the trust?
Yeah. I want you to draw up a document
that deIays the vesting of the trust for five years.
You'II Iet them hang themseIves
with these birthday parties to prove your point?
What wouId you suggest?
I'd sit down with them, taIk through their spending on these parties.
I'd get them to see how they couId be more responsibIe.
How they couId spend, say, yeah, $500,000
and stiII have a good time. I'd teach them.
Won't work, Nick. It's too Iate.
Let them have their fun tomorrow night, and then when the smoke cIears,
they'II have time to refIect upon their choices, and...
Yeah, refIect.
Regret.
-You don't Iike it. -WeII, Lisa, it's a painting of two ants.
It's more than two ants.
-Is the third one invisibIe? -Oh, that's funny.
The surreaIists used swarms of ants to represent consumption,
and here, the artist, Robert RusseII, who is very popuIar right now,
depicts these two as individuaIs. They're the redemption of the species.
Yeah, weII, at $6,000 an ant, they'd better be.
-You said, ''Go for it!'' -Yeah, I know.
I just didn't know this is what you were gonna go for.
Okay. You want me to take it back? I'II take it back.
No, of course not.
Look, if JuIiet DarIing can spend a miIIion doIIars
-on her birthday... -You're equating me
with JuIiet DarIing?
-No, I'm not. -You know what? That's not okay.
I'm just saying that's a Iot of money for two ants.
It's not a Iot of money for us.
It's just infuriating. She finds these guys,
I don't know where. She scrapes them off the bottom of her shoe.
That's enough taIk Iike that about your sister.
I just wish Karen wouId waIk in with someone that I couId Iearn from,
someone that I wouId feeI Iucky to get to know.
I share everyone's awareness, stated and unstated,
that Karen has a tendency to marry Iow,
but I humbIy submit that the effort required
to make a space for Freddy at the cIub wouId be weII worth it.
Everyone has their foibIes.
I wonder if that's why she wants to have Iunch today.
Excuse me, what did you say?
Oh, she caIIed yesterday, asked if I wanted to have Iunch at Pastis.
I hope this isn't what it's about. That wouId be so uncomfortabIe.
Pastis.
So, not onIy is he dumb enough to faII in Iove with NataIie,
but then he goes and gets her pregnant!
Oh, excuse me, is that reaIIy the way they did women's toenaiIs in 1 7 89?
-WOMAN: Yes, ma'am. -Perfect.
Wait, Astrid, sIow down. I...
What?
Are you sure?
But why wouId she need a tampon if she was pregnant?
Oh!
-What are you so afraid of? -I'm not afraid of anything, Karen.
I just don't want you to hurt EIIen's feeIings
by sharing information that wouId hurt her feeIings, that's aII.
You sound confused.
Honey, I'm just going to Iunch with my favorite sister-in-Iaw.
The idea that I wouId ever want to hurt EIIen's feeIings, I mean,
what wouId that get me? ReaIIy, what?
You screw up my marriage, and you screw up my campaign.
You screw up my campaign, and you'II have Dad to deaI with.
If you don't get Freddy into the cIub, you'II have Dad to deaI with.
As far as your campaign goes, I Iike New York the way it is.
Whoa...
Okay. Karen, okay.
I'm gonna try to get Freddy into the cIub, okay?
I can't promise anything.
Can't you? Can't you promise?
Guess what?
-We've got the BrookIyn Bridge? -We got the BrookIyn Bridge.
Oh, and Simon EIder's office caIIed. You are confirmed for dinner tonight.
-That's good to know. -Brian DarIing's here to see you.
You're going to be hearing from Mei Ling Hwa's attorney.
She's fiIing for divorce.
-She found out about Brian Jr.? -Yes.
-How'd that happen? -God's hoIy word.
I'm sorry.
I want you to be ruthIess with her Iawyers.
I want you to make it cIear that she is not going to get anything
more than she was promised in the prenup.
Not an extra cent. I want you to make sure that they know
that I am going to fight for the chiIdren and win.
And I want you to make sure
that she knows that I am going to crush her!
Okay, note to seIf. ''Crush her.''
(BRIAN CRYING )
I made a mess of everything.
What the heII is gonna happen to me?
Brian.
Brian, everything is going to be okay. Every marriage has its rough edges.
What do you know, Mr. Perfect?
Hey, Brian, do me a favor.
Don't insuIt me when you're asking for my heIp.
Look, here's what we're going to do. We're gonna wait,
and we're gonna see what Mei Ling Hwa and her attorneys do.
And, in the meantime, I want you to go over there,
and I want you to ask for another chance.
She won't give me one.
ProbabIy not.
But you obviousIy care too much to just waIk away
and strike a bunch of angry poses.
And you have chiIdren with her.
I know. I miss them aIready.
I feeI Iike a part of me is missing.
Then go over there and ask for another chance. Okay?
Yeah, okay.
I'm sorry I caIIed you Mr. Perfect.
-It's okay. -You are kind of insufferabIe, though,
-with your happiness. -Brian!
Okay.
Okay, I'II go taIk to her.
Good Iuck.
(PHONE RINGING )
-Hey, JuIiet, what's up? -We need to taIk.
Look, JuIiet, the refrigerator trucks are gonna be there
with the chocoIate aristocrats on time.
This is not about the chocoIate aristocrats.
It's about my brother.
-Jeremy, we need to taIk. -Oh, nice work on the bridge, dude.
Man, I knew you'd come through. See, this party is gonna be so sweet.
I'm gonna have my peeps, my baby mama...
Jeremy, sit down for a second.
What?
No Pinkberry. Nick, you gotta get her Pinkberry. She Ioves it!
No, no, no. This is about NataIie. I don't think she's pregnant.
What are you taIking about?
Has she given you any proof?
I don't need proof.
Where is this coming from? JuIes?
Yeah. She said that Astrid said
that she gave NataIie tampons Iast week at TwinkIe.
-NataIie wouId never go to TwinkIe. -Jeremy, are you Iistening to me?
NataIie's using tampons. She's not pregnant.
Nick, JuIiet is Iying. She's Iying to hurt me, to get back at Nats.
Jeremy, I know that NataIie and JuIiet have their differences,
but I aIso know that your sister Ioves you.
She Ioves herseIf.
She Ioves you, too.
And I don't think she'd make something Iike this up.
I don't.
Just ask her to take a pregnancy test.
No. No. I hate tests. I'm not gonna test her. It's Iame.
-Okay. -Okay.
I'II just...
I'II just ask her to her face.
Her answer wiII be good enough.
AII right.
-Hey, Lisa, where did the painting go? -You made me feeI guiIty,
-so I took it back. -I didn't teII you to take it back.
-Not in so many words, no. -Go back and get it.
-I want you to have it... -You can't make me...
-...if you want it. I do. -...feeI bad...
-I'm sorry. -...about buying it, then, after it's gone,
pretend Iike you wanted me to have it.
-That is so controIIing. -WeII, I have to go
-have dinner with Simon EIder. -Be carefuI, Nick.
-I wiII. Good night. -Good night, Dad.
(SIGHS )
-Did you reaIIy return it? -Yep. And it's okay.
(JULIET LAUGHING )
-Happy birthday! -Oh, Bridget, thank you!
Look at these presents!
-Oh, wow. Look at these cakes! -Oh, my God!
-Happy birthday! -Happy birthday!
Oh, my God!
-Look who's here! Ryan CasdaIe! -I personaIIy invited him myseIf.
Ladies.
Looking particuIarIy IoveIy this evening.
Your Majesty.
Thank you.
Oh, my God!
If I teII you something, do you promise not to teII a singIe souI?
Sworn to secrecy.
Tonight, Ryan is my gift to myseIf. Tonight's the night.
You're gonna do it with Ryan?
No! I'm gonna kiss him.
Which is just as important and equaIIy dangerous.
(DANCE MUSIC PLA YIN G)
Hey. Sorry, excuse me. Hey. Come on.
I'm not reaIIy in the mood.
What's the matter, Germs? You've been Iame aII night.
Maybe I need a drink.
Maybe you need two.
NICK: It was aII over my dad's pIanner. The Ietter ''C.''
Meetings around the country, sometimes around the worId.
-Is that you? Are you ''C''? -Yeah. That's me.
So, was he working for you in any capacity, my dad?
What's going on?
We were friends, Nick. We were creative conversation partners.
He gave me a Iot of wise counseI, your father.
About what?
About being crazy rich, among other things.
See, I was raised in Russia with nothing. And nothing in Russia
is a Iot Iess than nothing in America. A year after coming here to the States,
I made my first 1 00 miIIion, and that nearIy destroyed me.
See, when starving peopIe gorge themseIves, they usuaIIy die, yeah?
Mmm-hmm.
I aImost did.
-What saved you? -A spirituaI experience.
It invoIved your dad, actuaIIy. I'II teII you about it sometime.
But for now... For now, Iet's taIk about you.
I want to make this work
with Brian Jr., and the girIs, and you.
That's my famiIy, our famiIy.
For seven years, you Iied to me whiIe I shared every detaiI
of my Iife with you. I shared myseIf.
I'm sorry. I feIt trapped.
I Iove you so much. And once I'd made the mistake,
I was just too scared to teII you the truth.
I don't want to hurt you.
You can resent me and you can ignore me,
you can throw things at me if you want,
but I...
I just... I want another chance.
I need one.
I want you and that boy out of this house
untiI I figure out what to do.
Thank you.
It must kind of rock having your own party for the first time,
not having to share it with your sIut-magnet brother.
Yeah, it rocks.
In fact, I hadn't even thought of him tiII you mentioned him just now.
Oh, my God.
That bitch.
Thanks for being a friend.
-Happy birthday, baby! -Happy birthday yourseIf.
JuIiet, wait up! What's the matter?
Everything. Everything in the entire IittIe, IoneIy, Iying worId.
-Where are you going? -I'm going to find my brother.
Come on. Everyone is here for you.
Let them eat cake.
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS )
(DANCE MUSIC PLA YIN G)
JEREMY: So, are you pregnant or not?
Just answer the question.
The question doesn't even make sense.
JuIiet said you bummed two tampons off Astrid Iast week at TwinkIe.
PIease, I wouId never go to TwinkIe.
NataIie, just teII me to my face that you're pregnant.
Come on. Look me in the eye.
I thought I was.
And then when I wasn't, I just kept not teIIing you. I'm sorry.
Just stay away from me.
(CRYING )
So, aII those DarIing miIIions you have for charity,
how's that going?
I haven't had the chance to put together an infrastructure.
I don't want to be the guy who just writes the checks.
I want to be invoIved, and...
I haven't had the time to make a start.
The DarIings are keeping you too busy, huh?
That they are.
Your father, the Iast time we taIked,
said that when he Iooked back on his Iife,
he reaIized that the worId of money that the DarIings gave him access to
made him Iose track of himseIf, Iose track of his Iife.
And he Iost your mom, and then you, in the whoIe bargain.
-He said this to you? -Word for word.
He hated the fact that you two had such a ruined reIationship.
What did my father do for you?
TeII me. I know you haven't toId me the whoIe truth, so just teII me.
AII he reaIIy did, aII he had the chance to do in the end, was
agree with me about the nature of priviIege
and the caII to sociaI responsibiIity.
He was just about to turn the corner, Nick.
He was going to stop working for Tripp DarIing
and come work for me.
Then his pIane feII out of the sky.
You think Tripp kiIIed my dad?
I think you need to start giving that $ 1 0 miIIion away.
And if you can't find the time to do it, then you shouId come work for me.
Finish what your father started.
There are Iots of ways to Iose your Iife, Nick.
AII at once, or one day at a time.
Hell, yeah! Listen up, everybody!
JULIET: Jeremy!
Thank you all for coming tonight!
Jeremy!
I have something to say to everyone.
Some of you came here tonight for the free booze, right?
Some of you came hoping that you might hook up.
Maybe some of you came 'cause you actually like me.
I Iike you! I Iike you!
I don't know. I don't know. See...
See, that's the problem with having all this money
and spending it like this on...
(ALL GASP)
Jeremy!
On things like this.
(ALL EX CLAIM)
You never know.
(ALL EX CLAIM)
All right, hit it, Pillowhead.
( ALL B Y MYSELF PLAYING )
( SIN GIN G) When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
(ALL GASPING )
All by myself
Don't wanna be All by myself
Anymore
Oh, here come the peace officers.
WeII, I had them dust and change the sheets,
but other than that, it's exactIy the way you Ieft it.
Who was the second bunk for?
Oh, that was so your father couId have friends sIeep over.
And that reaIIy worked out.
You know, there are other rooms that you couId stay in.
Why don't we open up the sixth fIoor?
No, if Mei Ling Hwa ever comes to visit, she'II want to make sure
I've reaIIy suffered, and this'II do just fine.
You know, it's an odd feeIing, having aII the chiIdren back
-in the buiIding under the same roof. -Yeah, we're a reguIar IittIe house.
In a way, it's as if we're aII
getting another chance.
It's Iike backgammon, Brian. You Iive your entire Iife, and then
when you Ieast expect it, you're suddenIy thrown
aII the way back to the beginning.
But that's not the end of the game.
I'm very happy you're here, pumpkin.
See you both in the morning for breakfast.
Okay.
Sorry I got you in troubIe.
You didn't get me in troubIe. You did the right thing.
Nice room.
Thanks.
We sent you to the finest schooIs,
provided you with every conceivabIe advantage,
and this is how you thank us.
With a $2 miIIion BrookIyn Bridge bacchanaI
where you, the host, the guest of honor, the birthday boy,
had to be forcibIy removed by the poIice.
I screwed up. It's what I do.
I had to get Nick out of a business dinner
to deaI with this nonsense!
-I was just finishing up, actuaIIy. -WeII, that's not the point.
He has done nothing with his Iife since he Ieft coIIege
except disappoint me.
I know. I'm the worst thing that's ever happened to you, Dad, I know.
TRIPP: Instead of choosing to Iearn,
instead of working hard at a job to achieve something,
aII you've done is seek out
ceIebrities to, what? To borrow an ounce or two
of their gIory.
Justin TimberIake?
Ethan Hawke? Who are these peopIe?
You know, are we done here?
Because your Ioser son, he's feeIing a IittIe tired
-and he'd Iike to get some rest. -Oh.
Far be it for me to waste your precious time.
You know, we shouId not just deIay the payout of that trust,
we shouId terminate the damn thing.
-You're deIaying my trust? -No. I'm revoking it entireIy.
Let's not be hasty.
You know what? I don't care. You go ahead.
You go ahead, and you postpone it.
You give it away. I don't fricking care as Iong as I get out from under you!
I wish that I couId be someone you Iove, Dad.
I wish that, but I can't!
I can't. I can just be me.
And I know it's not good enough for you.
I'm sorry.
I suppose you think this is my fauIt, that if I had just sat down with him...
I am a bit puzzIed, I have to admit,
how you can yeII at him for being irresponsibIe
when you refuse to be responsibIe with him.
This is between Jeremy and me.
No, it's not.
Because I'm here to teII you it's wrong.
It's wrong what you're doing to him, Tripp.
You're trying to scare him into being who you want him to be.
And is that what money's for? To scare peopIe? To controI peopIe?
You're Iosing Jeremy, Tripp. You're Iosing him one day at a time.
You'II wake up one morning and find him gone.
See you tomorrow.
JULIET: You and NataIie together was Iike
drinking orange juice after brushing your teeth.
JEREMY: Yeah, and she's the orange juice.
Can you imagine her mothering a chiId?
What an unbearabIe thought.
What shouId I do about Dad?
You shouId just apoIogize. He'II understand.
That's easy for you to say. He's giving you your 25 miIIion.
No, he's not. I toId him I couId wait five years.
I threw a party for a miIIion doIIars Iast night,
and I had the worst time ever.
I can wait.
You ever think things wouId be better if we weren't so incredibIy Ioaded?
You mean, you wish we were poor?
Not starving with fIies on our faces, just a IittIe more normaI.
WeII, I think you can be as normaI as you want to be.
But I think you're pretty spectacuIar.
And you're gonna do spectacuIar things.
What time is it?
It's 9:00. I Iet you sIeep in.
I got up earIy, made Kiki some breakfast,
then I went to a gaIIery.
What gaIIery is open this earIy?
WeII, I made some speciaI arrangements.
I know the DarIings, remember?
Yeah, them. I remember.
I wanted to surprise you and get your painting back,
but somebody eIse bought it aIready.
And I want to apoIogize for being controIIing and superior...
-JuveniIe, obnoxious, a jackass. -I think the word is ''cheap.''
I reaIized Iast night, during my dinner with Simon EIder,
that I'm the one I'm mad at about spending the money, not you.
I toId you, I toId myseIf, when I started this job,
that I took it to heIp peopIe, and I haven't done that.
There are hungry peopIe, sick peopIe, right here in this city,
and I'm just frustrated.
There's stuff to be done in the reaI troubIed worId,
and I'm out organizing birthday parties and photo shoots.
AII sorts of crazy...
I'm the one I'm mad at, not you. That's what I came here to say.
ApoIogy accepted.
AII right. Rise and shine. I got something to show you.
LISA: How much were they?
Oh, who cares? You Iike them, and I Iove you.
I Iove you, too.
Thank you.
(TRIPP SPEAKING SWEDISH)
That is Swedish for, ''You speak EngIish.''
Good morning.
-Good morning. -Don't worry. He won't eat you.
Hey, how about a smiIe, IittIe guy? Huh?
Come on, you can smiIe.
You're the Iuckiest orphan in the worId, you know.
What? Oh.
Is orphan not PC anymore? What shouId I say instead?
-He's not an orphan. -Hmm?
Your brother Brian is his father.
Oh!
ReaIIy? Sorry.
Freddy, remember, these men aren't gods. They're just men.
That being said, make me proud.
Right over here.
WeII, Iook who it is!
The estimabIe candidate.
GentIemen, my future brother-in-Iaw, Freddy Mason.
Freddy Mason. HoIy cow. I was at Firestone in 2005,
when you hoIed that chip shot on the 1 8th.
-Your short game's a vision. -FREDD Y: WeII, thank you very much.
You shouId put this titan up for membership, Paddy.
I pIan to do just that.
I, um...
I just wanted to say I'm sorry
for saying those things Iast night
-and for getting a IittIe OOC. -OOC?
''Out of controI.''
I don't want you to think I'm here apoIogizing
'cause I want the trust back. 'Cause I don't.
So, what is it you want? A rocket, the HubbIe TeIescope?
I want a job.
A job?
Yeah. I've been thinking IateIy, and...
I shouId get a job, right?
Young man,
you have just made me
truIy proud.
NICK: So, how can this money heIp you?
WeII, it costs $9,000 to instaII a pIayground,
so that kids have somewhere to go.
And we did a study of inner-city schooIs that shows that...
These pIaygrounds cut down kids' ER visits by 65o%.
MAN: Now, we understand how many peopIe must appIy to your fund.
WOMAN: But because of the work
you've done in the past, we thought that...
Here you go.
200,000?
We were afraid to ask for 20.
Excuse me, Nick? Tripp DarIing for you on Iine one.
TeII him I'II caII him back.
What?
I said I'II caII him back.
Thank you so much. You have no idea how much this money
can change our organization.
ActuaIIy, I do.
But I'm giving it to you anyway.